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Excuse Me, Does This
Airplane Have A Bathroom?
We had a run out of the
New York area into central Pennsylvania with a 19 passenger turbo prop.
It was an awful airplane from a passenger stand point but it was fun to
fly. During those days there was an upstart airline that was going
to conquer the airline world. They lasted a few years and went bankrupt.
With all the added flights of this airline, it was nothing to sit in line
for and hour or two waiting for your slot for departure. This was
especially true if the weather was bad.
Imagine you are a business
man who got up early for another flight to do business. You arrive
early at the airport with
a cup of coffee (maybe your second). You check in only to find the
flight is delayed because of the weather. More coffee. Finally,
the call to board your flight which is scheduled for 45 minutes.
No problem, or so you think. You taxi out and sit in line for 90
minutes before getting airborne. While waiting you casually look
around to find a bathroom but you don't seem to see one. Of course
after departure, the ride is extremely bumpy due to the strong winds.
This also means the flight will be a lot longer than scheduled, but you
don't know that yet.
We were in the cockpit minding
our own business when we felt a tap on the shoulder. There was no
Flight Attendant on those flights so I knew it was a passenger. He
said "Excuse me, does this airplane have a bathroom?" I knew right
away this guy was in trouble. Have you ever strolled up to the cockpit
during flight to chat? I apologized but told him "No." He was
sitting in the front row so I was able to glance at him every once and
awhile. He was in trouble. After about 15 more minutes of bouncing
around, he came up and asked how long until our arrival. I told him
with these winds it could be another hour. He sat down but looked
none too comfortable. 15 minutes later I felt another tap on my shoulder.
He asked "do you have a jar?" I did not. Another 15 minutes passed
and I felt the tap again. "Do you have anything I could Use?"
I was getting a little desperate also because he was in serious distress.
I scoured the whole cockpit and finally came up with a "sick sac" which
I quickly gave to him. He was very appreciative.
By this point, all 19 passengers
on board, including the women, had watched this drama unfold.
Now he had the means, but
next came the practical issue of "How?" You couldn't exactly stand
up in the cabin because of the tight quarters. The gentleman sitting
next to him opened his USA Today and held it up as a "privacy" curtain.
Some how it all worked out.
Now I don't know this for
sure, but it would not surprise me if some time enroute that man made a
solemn vow never to drink coffee again if he would only make it through
the ordeal. At least I am sure he changed his morning routine so
as to never again say "Excuse me, does this plane have a bathroom?". |
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